Your sweet newborn is a joy and delight! They are the focus of your life and you love it that way. That newborn swiftly moves into babyhood and then toddlerhood. It feels like the blink of the eye. Now is the time to be preparing for the frustrations during this expansive time of growth and development.
Often parents are blindsided by this and rush to try to “make it right” for the little one, but frustration is part of growing and moving onto the next phase of development. Babies will develop a cry of frustration or other vocalizations to let you know they’re not too happy with how things are going. You’ll know it when you hear it – it’s not like that cry of hunger or that they need changing or that they are fussy or tired.
You’ll hear it when they are on their tummy pushing up to get ready to start crawling. They want to move, they feel the need to move, but they aren’t quite there yet so a frustration cry may start. You might hear a lot of other vocalizations at this time as well because they are really working on movement. It’s a big job, it’s challenging, and it’s frustrating sometimes. What they need from you is support, encouragement, and calmness.
Talk to them about what they are experiencing. Let them know you are cheering them on. Maybe you place a toy out of their reach to encourage them. Perhaps you simply tell them that you see them working hard and you know they can do it. You might reposition them so they start anew. All of these actions are providing them with the emotional support that is building their self-confidence.
Often babies who are working hard will get tired and that cry may shift to “I need you now. I’m tired.” That’s when you move in to comfort them, calming them and helping them to rest. You are assuring them that you’ll be there for them but you also want them to try new things and move forward. It’s a delicate balance, but if you tune in you’ll be great.
The first three years of life is full of the frustration of growing and developing. That frustration sometimes comes out in crying or screaming or tantrums. How you react to their frustration will go a long way to build their self-confidence and self-reliance.
